::: thud :::

Baseball

So . . . not only did the Mariners beat the Mets . . .

Not only did the Mariners beat the Mets in a relatively convincing fashion . . .

Not only did the Mariners beat the relatively convincing fashion and score four runs for Ryan Franklin in doing so . . .

The Mariners beat the Mets in fairly convincing fashion, scoring four runs for Ryan Franklin in doing so, against Pedro Freakin' Martinez.

Oh, and they've clinched something like their eighth series win in the last ten.

Somebody catch me. I think I'm gonna faint.